Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Spatially challenged

Thomas suggested I try a “test pack” to make sure everything that’s left in the apartment -- more specifically, my closet -- fits into our luggage for the trip. No problem…I thought.

It's like Wardrobe Tetris. Too bad I'm terrible at that game.
OK, so I might have a slight problem. As you can see from the photo above, I’ve filled three suitcases and still have quite a lot to pack. And going out shopping with a friend the other night certainly didn’t help.

I could have sworn that my clothes, shoes and various remaining odds and ends would easily fit into two medium suitcases. After all, I’ve already shipped about seventy percent of my closet. But now, I’m finding that my shoes alone will fill a suitcase. Crap.

But let it be known: no skirt, scarf or stiletto shall be left behind. Even if it means I have to wear 22 layers of clothing at the airport.

What that's Mr. Immigration Officer? Sweating? Oh, no...I'm not nervous, I'm just a closet hoarder. Literally.

Monday, October 25, 2010

I don’t deliver

For the past few weeks, Thomas and I have been selling a lot of furniture, electronics and random things we don’t want to carry over to Germany. Thanks to Craigslist and Yammer, we’ve been pretty successful.

But anytime you try selling stuff to the general public, you have to expect a few eye-rolling moments. While I ignored most of these, I’ve included a couple of my favorites (typos included).

  • Nearly new Dyson vacuum posted for $400
    • Potential buyer: “I give 200 dollars cash today. Let me know when/where to pick up.”
    • Me: “Really? Two-hundred whole dollars?? THANK YOU! I posted this item for sale more than 13 hours ago and was starting to feel that all was lost. You, kind sir – or madam – have certainly rescued me from this most uncomfortable state of resale purgatory. Please meet me at the corner of hellhath and frozenover at 7 p.m. But, because I am soooo grateful for your help, I will only accept $100, at most. I just hope that you carry money in pennies because I have penchant for large amounts of incredibly small change.
  • Toaster posted for $5: 
    • Potential buyer: “I’m really interested in ur toaster but need it delivered to the address below. Thanks.”
    • Me: “Of course! I would be more than happy to drive across town to present you with this toaster. I do hope you will find it to your liking. It does an amazing job toasting gluten-based items. As with any large purchase, I’m sure you would like to try it out first. Therefore, I shall bring a hand baked, pre-sliced loaf of bread for you to sample. Of course, there will be a nominal delivery change of $52.73 (exact change only). Please let me know at what time I should arrive and I will make haste.